Horcruxes and Unhappy Dark Lord

Čt 29 dubna 2021

Originally published as “Quest for Immortality by the Unhappy Dark Lord” on Reddit.

I was thinking about this very unhappy adept for the Dark Lordship, Tom Riddle:

  1. Diary — while Tom Riddle was still travelling after leaving Borgin and Burkes, and he considered dropping it into The Mariana Trench as the safest place to be. Safe it was, but the diary was squashed by the weight of the water (15,750 psi, 1107.33 kg/cm², 10 kilometres depth), a ton on each square centimetre was just too much even for the magical protections on the diary.
  2. Hufflepuff’s Cup — while still travelling he left it in the middle of the Sahara desert, specifically at Reggane; which unfortunately was the place of French Nuclear tests in 1960 completely evaporating it.
  3. Marvolo Gaunt’s Ring — left in the Gaunt’s shack, which was a miserable ruin with an unknown owner (Gaunts didn’t bother to register their ownership in the Muggle land registry). So, when Muggles were building a motorway pass, it was silently eliminated (better to ask for forgiveness than permission). A hundred metric ton bulldozer was not impressed by few slithering snakes and run through wards over the shack without even noticing them. The ring in the box was later found by a construction worker, who was immediately killed by the curse. After even the emergency doctor, who was investigating the incident, has been killed, the company decided to cover up the whole disaster, and threw the ring (holding it in the protective cover) into a blast furnace, which quickly overcame all Horcrux protections and it was destroyed.
  4. Slytherin’s locket — he left it in the cave near the sea and it was salvaged by Regulus Black. Kreacher was not clueless, he asked for help His Mistress (a bit of elvish sophistry … when she is dead, she is not a member of the family any more, so he could tell her whatever he needed) and found a book in the Black Library, and after learning how to, he made a trip to Rockall and using Fiendfyre.
  5. Ravenclaw diadem — it was left in the Room of Hidden Things, and later found by Winky, who was cleaning up all things left in the castle by her now-imprisoned young Master, Barty Crouch Jr., when he was still nineteen, but excessively smart and planning for DADA Mastery. While looking for some lost stuff in the Room, she found an excessively Dark magical object. She knew that her young Master would like to preserve it, so she travelled with it for him to Azkaban (wards didn’t stop the elf’s apparition), but she was attacked there by Dementors. In a panic, she dropped the diadem, apparated away, and the horcrux was immediately sucked dry by a Dementor savouring extra Dark piece of soul.
  6. Harry’s piece of soul — Dumbledore was not an idiot, even without knowing what it was exactly, before Harry was deposited with Dursleys, Dumbledore scraped out an unknown piece of Dark Magic matter in Harry’s head, while it was still fresh and it still didn’t take a root in his skull. It went out easily and without the support of anything living died on the pavement of Privet Drive, Surrey.

So, when Harry got to Hogwarts in September 1991, there were no Horcruxes remaining and Harry had wonderful seven years of study, where the most memorable events of his life were his Quidditch victories and his first date with ${somegirl}.

Category: faith Tagged: HPprompt harryPotter blogComment

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On Humanism

Ne 07 března 2021

I have heard today yet another sermon where the preacher fought against the great evil of humanism (fortunately, this was a tangential comment, the main point of sermon was something else and it was very good). It irked me again as it does anytime (most often) American protestant pastor fights …

Category: faith Tagged: Christianity

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On Vampires

Ne 24 ledna 2021

(my comment regarding vampires on AO3)

Technical question of the day. Would the Homonum Revelius spell reveal a hiding vampire? I figure it will reveal a hiding werewolf but they’re still sort of human. Aren’t vampires supposed to be “dead” and so would such a spell reveal them …

Category: faith Tagged: review harryPotter blogComment

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Their finest

St 02 září 2020

(my comments on the review of “Their Finest” by Susan Wloszczyna)

I really wanted to like this film, it started nicely, and generally I like it, but then there are points which just don’t make sense at all. It is even worse when whole film is about scriptwriting.

  • Catrin …

Category: faith Tagged: review blogComment film

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O literárních stylech biblických knih aneb Job

So 18 července 2020

(kázání, silně krácené pronesené ve sboru ČCE Praha-Braník, 26. července 2020)

Textem dnešního kázání je v podstatě celá kniha Job a větší část Starého zákona, ale abych měl alespoň nějaký konkrétní text před kázáním, vybral jsem Job 42:1-6:

Job na to Hospodinu řekl: // „Uznávám, že jsi všemocný a že …

Category: faith Tagged: sermon czech

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On bashing

Pá 24 dubna 2020

Bashing and similar are not the cause of poor quality of their stories, but they are just a symptom of the author being lead by the poor design of his story into areas, which would be impossible to resolve or it would be too difficult, so bashing is then just …

Category: faith Tagged: review harryPotter blogComment fromReddit

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